29/01/2010

You Know You've Studied Abroad in Italy When...

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Achei super engraçado!
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1. When you go back home, people ask you why you move your hands so much when you talk.

2. You have to explain to your friends visiting from Germany that the public transportation schedule is an "approximation".

3. You know the best place to get a gelato, and you go there. Every day.

4. You're used to having to walk home every now and then because of all the strikes. "Sciopero" was one of the first words you learned.

5. Eating spaghetti every day is no big deal.

6. You're not surprised when someone tells you he ate a whole pizza by himself.

7. You have breakfast at a bar, and you're not an alcoholic.

8. A church in every corner looks just about right.

9. Taking an oral exam in a surrounded classroom with people chatting and minding their own business has just become a commonplace.

10. Seeing an "Ape Triciclomotore" doesn't shock you anymore (these are the little bike with three wheels and a booth).

11. You consider civil engineering as a part of your street, and you can't imagine how it was, back in 1992, when no noise was waking the neighbourhood.

12. Giving an exam up to 8 times just seems possible to you.

13. Talking to a teacher about a major law concept while he is talking too, on the phone, with a friend of his, telling you to keep on going by waving his hand.

14. You’re able to tell your friends, back home, if the couple you matched a few meters away from you in that street, are Italian tourists (you can sometimes even spot the clues: brand sunglasses, “Invicta” back bag, and this specific tan…).

15. You want to buy hair wax again.

16. Food has become one of your major concerns.

17. You wish you were a fair haired girl with big boobs so that all of your oral exams would go nicer.

18. “Vespa” has replaced “scooter” in your vocabulary.

19. Going in motorbike is not so much a shame as it used to.

20. Neither is yelling for your friends in the street.

21. You’ve understood that the dumb smiling tanned man you’ve seen so much time on TV is in fact head of the country.

22. You’ve forgotten that there were actual shows on TV (and not only ads and naked girls).

23. You sing “Sere Nere” (di Tiziano Ferro) under the shower from time to time.

24. Wearing :
- if you’re a girl, trousers with written “Juicy” on your butt
- if you’re a boy, a t-shirt “D&G : Damela e Godi”
is fun to you.

25. Listening to RDS (“Radio Dimensione Suono: 100% Grandi Successi”) has become a pleasure.

26. You’ve understood that Italy was homeland of the eighties, and you enjoy it.

27. You realise that, back home, the “mercato” is not so cheap it was back there.

28. You want to discuss everything, back home: from the price you pay your food to the price you pay your entrance in the night club.

29. You’ve robbed a bike, driven in the wrong way, been arrested, and managed to walk away without a single fine to pay.

30. You’ve experienced driving fast, in the wrong way, downtown.

31. You have the number of a guy whose job is to steal bikes, in your phone.

32. Road signs are a joke to you, too.

33. You’ve experienced “Grappa Premium” and “Limoncello” the same night, and you didn’t throw it all up.

34. You ask for extra “mozzarella di buffala” on your pizza.

35. You realise that “alternativo” doesn’t necessarily means “penniless”.

36. You’re no longer shocked by the political view generally referred as “Partito Cristiano Communista” (Cristianist Communism).

37. You explain to your room mates that your exam is at 9 in the morning so if everything is fine, you’ll see them at around 6 in the evening. And they are not shocked.

38. You have a different relationship with the term “being late”.

39. You are surprised to see, back home, teachers on time.

40. You know someone who knows someone who can do what you want to be done.

41. It takes you 2 hours to hang up your phone (ciao... cia-ciao ! ... si, si...ciao! un bacio...cia-ciao... mmh... ciao bella... etc.)

42. It takes you less than 15 seconds to drink a burning hot espresso.

43. You're not shocked that a 60 year old wears mini skirts.

44. You're not shocked that a 6 year old wears mini skirts.

45. You're not shocked when a carabiniere hits on you.

46. You're not shocked when a carabiniere starts drinking with you at a party, while he was intially there because of the loud noise of your party.

47. You're not shocked to see a woman wearing old sweat pants, lousy shoes, a dirty shirt, and... Prada sunglasses.

48. You think French administration is efficient and prompt.

49. It physically hurts you to see someone putting ketchup in his spaghetti.

50. You think paying 9 euros for a pizza is expensive.

51. You know that crossing a street in a pedestrian crossing is only marginally safer than jaywalking.

52. You look both ways before crossing a street (even if the street is one-way).

53. You jaywalk fearlessly anyway.

54. You're used to being surrounded by old ladies with giant fur coats.

55. You had to wait over a month for Telecom to install your phone line.

56. During the wait for the phone line, you leeched the neighbor's wireless connection.

57. You end up paying for two modems.

58. When you call to complain, they either suggest you switch companies, or hang up on you after you waited on the line for 40 minutes.

59. You hate the "Questura" because they made you go, waste a whole day and pay 60 euro (if you're not European), you NEVER got your "Permesso di Soggiorno" even after staying for 6 months in Italy and realising you could've stayed in the country as an illegal resident and nobody would've given a damn anyway.

60. When you finally receive your "Permesso di Soggiorno" it has already expired

61. You visit a "negozio" between 1 and 3 pm and find it odd that they're open at that time.

62. You never wait for a seller if on the closed shop doors is written “torno subito”.

63. You've paid a "supplimento" on a train even though you checked the damn schedule 8 miliion times and bought your ticket from an actual person at a counter and asked about the supplimento.

64. You know that the expressions "Ci vediamo in giro, ci sentiamo, a dopo, a piu tardi" mean "I’ll see you when I see you".

65. You are not shocked anymore when the teacher, trying to slip away from you, asks you not to tell anybody that you have seen him before the lesson.

66. You are not shocked when you see some students breaking a drinks dispenser, trying to catch an almost fallen Coca-Cola somebody before them had already paid for.

67. You are not shocked anymore when you hear different prices for the same gelato.

68. You are not shocked anymore when asking the way to the supermarket, you find yourself on the highway.

69. You've tried to find an open post office for a week - and failed.

70. Trying to end a contract with any company for months just seems normal.

71. You understand the concept that for every law there is an equal and contrary law.

72. You're not surprised when a tramp asks you for 5 euros to "watch" your car.

73. You pay the tramp.

74. You're not surprised there is no one watching when you get back to your car.

75. Your idea of a parking spot is definitely not the same anymore.

76. You're running late for class, and have to wait 20+ minutes for the bus. Then 3 buses show up at the same time.

77. When you don't know something, you say "boh" way more often than you used to.
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Que verdades mais verdadinhas...
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Any question?
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4 comentários:

Chrystiee M. disse...

Mas... mas... eu nunca estive em Itália! (hummm, cheira-me a vidas passadas xD)

- Muito obrigada, Rita! :)

Maria Ana disse...

ehehe sim! só com um fim de semana deu para perceber que são taaao verdadeiras.

Simply disse...

Very nice blog. I really enjoyed it.

Anónimo disse...

Damn I was going to buy a new Hummer in late 2012 and drive around the country for a vacation, Now I am going to have to shave my head and join the Hari.s, Muslims, Jews, Jehovah s, Mormons, Christians, and a few other wing nut groups just to cover all my bases.
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